Rude Boy

Being older than my brother has caused me to see the developmental changes in gender behaviors. Every time my brother comes home with a problem that he had at school, it would involve some sort of "fighting". My sisters and I never understood why he seemed so aggressive, for we never had such problems and we all went to the same school and had basically the same teachers. Then, after learning about how boys have this inner problem of "being a man" and not being a "sissy" I began to understand. Boys like my brother are faced with "manhood" defying issues everyday. For girls, it doesn't seem that big of a deal, but for guys it is.

I've learned that I need to be supportive of my brother as well as towards every other guy in my life, be it a friend, a cousin, etc. Today, guys need a little help.

Gender Babies

I was unaware of the fact that even babies start establishing gender roles. It's not that they are taught who to like but rather how to behave. As soon a baby is born, they're wrapped up in a gender influencing color. Girls are wrapped in a pink blanket and boys are in a blue. From then on, parents start treating their kids according what they believe their gender should be like. Mother's tend to be more attached to their daughters and more distant with their sons, which cause them to behave differently as toddlers. By the age of 1 or 2, girls are more attached to their mothers and boys are more adventurous and independent. This fits along with their gender roles where girls are dependent and boys are independent.

It's strange that this is how many parents are. I realize that when my sister was born, my dad would always call her "my little princess" and then when my brother was born he would call him "my brave young man".  It wasn't as though my dad was trying to fit my siblings into a gender mold intentionally, but that's what he was doing.

Weird.

From Strollers to Workplaces

From the very beginning, we've all met our own "social agent". Agents of socializations are found within families, daycares, jobs, schools, or any other organized group. These agents contribute to the way we think as we grow up. They influence our take on gender roles as well as our likes and dislikes. As for gender roles, our parents act as agents as soon as our infancy. It is common for the father to either hold the child while the mother pushes the the empty stroller or to push the stroller himself while the baby is in it. I never realized that that was a gender role gesture. It demonstrates the security that the father is trying to provide for the family. It implies that the dad is the one who leads the family. When I was younger, this is how it was. I remember my parent behaving in this manner on numerous occasions. As for likes and dislikes, educational institutions such as daycares and basic schools provide kids with a set of rules in regards to their gender. For example, boys tend to have more affiliation with violence, even at a young age. It is very common for a 3 or 4 year-old boy to talk about fighting than to talk about something more neutral and less violent. The same goes for girls but it's more that they have softer likes and dislikes; they have the common "ew bugs are gross" and "gross blood". These types of influences are present in daycares which affect children as young as 3.

Who would have known?

Let's Do Nothing!!!

On Tuesday, I attempted to do nothing. That had to be one of the most difficult tasks that I have ever had to do. When I was standing there, my mind was racing, thinking about things that I had to do later that period, later that day, let alone later that week. It was impossible for me to do nothing. This made me think about what we talked about in class. American culture consists of constant activity and planning that once we're presented a situation where we can just do nothing, we're unable to do so for we have been molded into a non-stop working generation. Countries around the world take advantage of their time to do nothing for it's in their culture to take life slow and easy. American culture craves for efficiency which relates back to the "Bemused in America" article where even the food sold is made to be efficient. The cheese is prepackaged and everything is made to save just a little bit more time. In Europe, to get shredded cheese, one would have to buy a block of cheese and shred it themselves. That's obviously not how it is here in America.

Isn't that just fascinating?

Who Am I?

For me, hearing "where are you from" and "where were you born" are normal everyday questions I receive from people that I meet for the first time. Because I am not white people automatically assume that I'm not American or a natural born American. Because I've had to explain my ethnicity, where my heritage is from, as compared to my nationality, where I was born, I've grown accustomed to identifying myself with a Turkish, Afghan, and Indian background. I always felt that I wasn't American rather just someone with a lot of culture living in America. That all changed when I went to Turkey. The moment I stepped off my plane, I realized how American I was. I was aware of my technological attachments, my American vernacular, as well as my American manners and customs. When I had to meet someone new, I automatically reached my hand out to shake theres. Apparently, that's not what they do in Turkey. They' seemed to be more timid and shy about shaking hands. That experience made me realize that I might not have the "ideal" American culture but rather bits and pieces of it as well as some of my ancestors culture and traditions.

It's a real eye opener.

Flush Flush Flush

So for the past few days in class, we've been talking about... toilets! Although it seems as though it doesn't have anything to do with sociology, it has a great influence and reflection upon cultures and their norms. We talked about how cultures do not have a "norm" for a culture is just there. There cannot be anything normal about a culture. There isn't a circumstance that presents itself in a way where we can judge another culture and say whether it is normal or not. For example, the Japanese toilets, they have the toilet itself in a separate room from the shower and the tub because to them they feel having all three in the same room is disgusting. We think that this is abnormal but to them, our bathroom set-up is abnormal. Whose normal is the true normal? That's the idea, there is no normal. Cultures and ideas just exist naturally. There is no right and wrong in a culture.

I learned this idea the hard way when I went on my pilgrimage to Saudi Arabia three years ago. The traditional Saudi Arabian toilet, or the hole in the ground, was something very new to me. I wasn't used to such a form. I felt that that style was not normal at all. I would always look for a western style toilet every time I had to use the washroom. Because I refused to believe that the Saudi Arabian toilet was a "normal" toilet, I made my vacation less enjoyable. I didn't have cultural awareness and I thought there was this normal style of living, like my own style of living. I was wrong.

Saarah M.

"A Bronx Tale"

We watched a movie in class that had a social construction and micro/macro dynamic theme. These ideas were portrayed within the town. "C" had to put up with all this racist behavior from his parents, friends, and neighbors. He ended up falling in love with a black girl which undoubtedly caused him strife. He worried about what his friends thought as well as what his dad thought about him dating someone who wasn't Italian let alone white. "C" didn't want to be like his friends or his dad, for he knew they lived racist life. When he got into that fight with Jane, he ended up calling her the "N" word. Although it was something awful, "C" didn't mean for there to be any pain behind it. He grew up in a neighborhood where that word is a part of their vernacular. All his friends used that word in their daily vocabulary. That word is very normal for him. For Jane and her brother, it was rude, racist, and very hurtful. This plays into his social construction. His setting and lifestyle molded him into thinking the way he did. As accepting as he wanted to be, he still had these ties back to racism due to how he was raised.

This situation is not new to me at all. I know people who are in the same situation as "C". They have these racist parents yet they're trying to live an accepting, non-prejudice, non-judgmental life. When I went out with these people, they would comment on a certain race, not to be racist, but to share their observation, and sometimes their comments would have a racist or prejudice undertone. I knew these people fairly well and so I knew that it wasn't just them being secretly racist. I knew it was because of their house-life and their up-bringing (their social construction) that made them think the way they did. Although I try to understand where it comes from, I still feel awkward when I have to hear it.